If The Computer Gets A Virus, Can I Take A Sick Day? mug

Product Page

In some places you probably will get at least some time off while your PC is getting cleaned. How long and how permanent that is may vary.

Computer Virus sticker

Product Page

I know we don't hear about computer viruses much anymore, but I think we would do well to remember back when they were the dominant form of malware. Things were handled so much differently then than to how they're handled now. Can you imagine business owners demanding computers be plugged back into the network before the infection was removed? 

The only answer tech support ever gives

from here and here

I imagine there are some tech support personnel out there who actually care about giving customers accurate information, but often times you get the quick answer that nobody really questions anymore. 

Are you not amazed?

found on Huge LOL

I'm not going to claim all pirated software is full of malware (that always seemed to be little more than a scare tactic), but there definitely was some tainted software out there, and being able to consistently avoid it (while still downloading) required some deliberate care. 

How you learn to stop using LimeWire

found on Izismile

I'm not going to pretend that you can't remain safe while downloading things you shouldn't be downloading, however, it's I think it's fair to suggest that children probably can't do it. 

Clean your own house first

from here and here

I realize that Microsoft Defender is a lot better than MSAV was, and that it may even be good enough for PCs, but I don't think it's reached the point of making PCs safer than Macs yet.

In addition to that, I have difficulty imagining most Mac owners using an antivirus at all, never mind one by the makers of Windows. Many Mac owners joke that Windows IS a virus.

Maybe some day MS Defender for Macs will make sense, but not before they clean up their reputation and their own platform.

Risky Superspreading Aerosols

from here and here (image source)

Thanks to Lisa Sass for tweeting this image of some place I definitely wouldn't want to be. It doesn't seem like there are any masks at all. I'm sure they've all been vaccinated, but that's only a single layer of defense and I'd expect security practitioners to know better than to rely on a single layer of defense, especially when the stakes are so high.

Computer Virus device case

Product Page

I can imagine that such a case might make someone think twice about trying to use your device without permission.

Malware Family sticker

Product Page

If you're familiar with malware families, this is not going to be anything like that. Instead, it just imagines various malware types as members of the family of things called "malware". It's also missing some malware types. Granted a lot of things can fall under the heading of trojan horse or bot, but if spyware gets it's own glyph then where's adware? Where are the downloaders, the droppers, the RATs? I guess the design would be too big if everything were included.

Computer Virus Word Cloud Mug

Product Page

Now you can think back and fondly remember all those times you had to stay at the office until the wee hours of the morning trying to clean up the latest virus or worm or vulnerability while you drink your morning coffee out of this travel mug.

Too bad it didn't stay that way

from here

I know he's gone, and there's a school of thought that says you shouldn't speak ill of the dead, but I've had this idea percolating in my head for a while now and there aren't really going to be any further opportunities to get it out of there.

I won't directly mention the less wholesome association between McAfee and whales - that's a blue waffle that can easily be found with a search engine. Instead I'll just recall that in the distant past, a virus called McWhale contained a message claiming that John McAfee wrote a virus known as Whale.

Still waiting for antivirus updates

from here and here (image source)

You might be wondering what computer virus is airborne, but in the age of wifi the real question is what computer virus isn't airborne. What I'm sure you can't see is that the mask has a wire mesh on the inside meant to block signals to and from his wireless antenna. 

Lack of oxygen might stop you from clicking things though

from here and here (image source)

Not only will this not stop computer viruses, I don't think this is going to do such a good job of stopping biological viruses either, and it's not terribly safe. 

Don't try this at home.

The hidden costs of innovation

from here

 It's been decades and people still haven't realized the error of allowing web content in the body of the email. Companies are still paying the price, including Apple playing a ton of money for vulnerabilities including at least some that would allow an email worm to spread and did allow researchers to compromise Apple's network.

With innovation there invariably comes new opportunities for exploitation, and while sometimes it may be difficult to see it coming, in this case it was entirely predictable.

Secure or insecure?

from here

When you hear a movie villain say that connections make you vulnerable but you know they're not talking to you personally.

Virus Scan sticker

Product Page

I didn't realize people put these sorts of stickers on things other than their laptops, but this particular placement means you're more likely to see your own sticker and be reminded why you really don't want to disable your AV.

Yes, your computer is safe from it

found on Ruin My Week

I mean, I do kind of get why the assumption would be that it's a computer virus. Human viruses are in the new far less.

This keyboard can fit so many biological booby traps in it

from here (image source)

The current pandemic really makes you look at those awful hacker stock photos with new eyes. I hope physical penetration testers are taking adequate precautions.

I think I see some holes in his plan

from here and here (image source)

I understand why people might want to cosplay as Bubble Boy, but there are holes for your hands to go through and the zipper isn't completely shut, and even if it was, it's not designed to keep out microscopic pathogens. Still, a little protection may be better than no protection at all (at least as long as you realize the limitations and aren't lulled into a false sense of security). Maybe this will reduce his chances of coming down with something.

The World's First Cyber Crime: The Morris Worm

Watch on YouTube

The past can provide us with an interesting perspective on how we got to where we are now.