Home Snekurity

from here and here (image source)

Thieves and burglars bypass locks all the time. This is an all-natural, completely organic, locally sourced alternative. 

It's also completely impractical and dangerous as fuck. I think I'll stick with locks.

Skid marks in 3...2...1...

from here and here (image source)

Locked doors can't protect you from everything. They stop the big threats, but little threats can find ways around, and the smaller they are the more options they have. 

Let's see you try to take candy from this baby

found on Sharenator

Supposedly this is a pet snake, but I'm pretty sure this snake is on guard duty, and it's doing a good job. No one wants to get anywhere near the kid.

It's too short

from here and here (image source)

If I had a 10 foot key I might be able to unlock that door, but nothing shorter will do.

Seems Legit

found on Chuck's Fun blog

Very much like the concept of a wolf in sheep's clothing.