No wonder they got banned

from here and here

I don't think NSO could reasonably claim to not know their products got misused, but I guess they should have been more proactive about dealing with it.

The Predator Defense

found on Daily LOL Pics

While it does look a bit like something out of an old Schwarzenegger film, it will cut down on phone thefts because the thieves would have to confront you to get it. Of course this is just step 1. Step 2 involves camouflage so the thieves can find you, and step 3 ... well, let's just say that if you can find a shoulder mounted laser cannon those thieves won't stand a chance.

Privacy by the Honour System

from here and here (image source)

The Honour System of course requires trust. I for one don't have the requisite trust to use one of these. 

I also wonder how you're supposed to wash your hands afterwards.

Zuck on a Truck

Watch on YouTube

When it comes to figures that have come to symbolize invasion of privacy, Mark Zuckerberg definitely give the Elf on the Shelf a run for it's money. The similarity is amazing too, their both so lifelike.

In case you weren't already sick of crypto

from here

I can't resist a good pun. Or a bad one, apparently.

Camouflage can be a good way to lose your lunch

found on Izismile

On the other hand, it could be handy for weight loss. 

Sleepy Security

from here (image source)

This mix-up has all the trappings of someone not being entirely awake. If your threat model only includes people who are equally sleepy, maybe this would work, but that's not very likely.

Malware Family sticker

Product Page

If you're familiar with malware families, this is not going to be anything like that. Instead, it just imagines various malware types as members of the family of things called "malware". It's also missing some malware types. Granted a lot of things can fall under the heading of trojan horse or bot, but if spyware gets it's own glyph then where's adware? Where are the downloaders, the droppers, the RATs? I guess the design would be too big if everything were included.

At least people know when they shouldn't enter

from here and here (image source)

I don't know about you but I'd rather just have a lock.

When you need a security guard for a blood bank

found on Izismile

If you've got a vamp problem, I'm sure this daywalker can take care of it.